It’s not that I have anything against restraining my partner; it is something I enjoy on those occasions that it happens, it’s just simply something that I don’t do very often.
On those occasions when it has happened, I will confess it is never very sophisticated. I marvel at the intricacy of the rope-work some bloggers display. The suspension photos that Cammies On The Floor posts have frequently taken my breath away.
For me, it has always been fairly rudimental and perfunctory; tying my partner’s hands to the headboard, and their feet to the legs of the bed, or tying their wrists and ankles to a chair. Often this will also involve some kind of blindfold and/or gag to increase their vulnerability.
It is a not so subtle power-play, but it is also a very strong statement of trust on the part of the person being restrained. They know that I could do whatever I want in those situations and they trust me to keep them safe in whatever I do.
The helplessness also adds to their anticipation. It increases the feeling of submission. There is the not knowing of what I am going to do with them and the fact they can do nothing about it in any event. Sometimes the “cruelest” thing I can do in these situations is do nothing at all.
For some, part of the enjoyment comes from the skill and the art of the knot/rope work. Sadly, I have no such skill; I can probably fashion a reasonably functional reef-knot and that’s about as far as it goes. If only I had the same skill that my pockets possess in entangling my headphone cables, I would then truly be a shibari master, but sadly that is not the case. Hence I restrict myself to scarves, my ties, my belt and occasionally cuffs.
It is something that I would like, perhaps, to explore further, to see how far I can push my very limited artistic talents. Ideally, I would then be able to take photographs that I could then use on one of my other pages.
So, to return to the original point, it is something I do enjoy, even though I’m not especially good at it, and the opportunities where it happens do not present themselves very often.