Steak & Blow-Job Day And All That Bollocks


Wicked WednesdaySteak and Blow-Job Day irritates the fuck out of me; in much the same way that the whole “blow-jobs are flowers for men” thing irritates the fuck out of me. Now this could be construed as sour grapes on the part of someone who, this year, once again, will almost certainly get neither. I assure you that this is not the case.

Well, while it’s true that I regularly don’t get either of these things on March 14th, I am fortunate that I get my cock sucked regularly (and expertly) enough that I have no complaints on that front (other than that we never seem to find any time at the moment, but that’s beyond our control), and I can eat steak whenever I feel like cooking it.

My problem isn’t with the abundance (or lack) of either of the constituent parts, or whether or not I get one, both, either, neither or none on the day in question, or indeed, on any day for that matter. No, my problem with Steak and Blow-Job day is that it is even a thing.

Now I realise that, as a “thing”, it is really meant as a joke, but I still have a fundamental problem with it.

I’m a guy, I <understatement>like</understatement> getting my cock sucked. As I’ve already mentioned, I am in the happy position that my cock gets sucked pretty regularly. Furthermore, the women who have sucked my cock have all done so willingly and enthusiastically. And herein lies my problem.

The Oral Sex ProjectThe idea that, by making it something “special” – a treat, as it were, only serves to perpetuate the idea that fellatio, as an act, is only performed as something that is done to please the suckee, and has to be endured by the sucker.  It suggests that all the pleasure is to be had by the recipient, and none by the giver/provider. Sucking their partner’s (or anyone’s) cock, it would seem, is a chore that those who do the sucking have to do in order to please those that are being sucked and, therefore, it needs to be turned into an occasion to mark the provision of a special favour.

I have one word for this…

Bollocks!

I’m not denying that blow-jobs are special; I for one am eternally grateful for every one I receive, and to everyone who has ever given me one. Nor am I denying that there are some women who do not like sucking cocks. Sex is a personal thing, and we all have our tastes, preferences, likes, dislikes, etc. Some women who do not like sucking cock may indeed do it on “special” occasions, recognising that, while it’s not their thing, their partner enjoys it so, every now and then, they will make that effort/sacrifice for them. I’m not judging. I neither condemn nor condone. Personally, if I were with someone who didn’t like doing it, I’d rather they just didn’t. I can respect that; but I also respect that some will endure it on occasion.

But, the thing is, in my experience, most women do enjoy sucking cock; in absolutely the same way that they enjoy any aspect of sex.  Why shouldn’t they? Sex is enjoyable (to put it mildly).

I recognise, that Steak and Blow-Job is meant to be a bit of harmless fun; and for most, it is. But it plays on the conceit that sex is for men to enjoy and for women to endure. Does it result in women feeling “forced” into doing something they really don’t like because they feel they have to? Honestly, I don’t know, but it wouldn’t surprise me if this were the case.

To me, the whole premise of Steak and Blow-Job Day is condescending, especially to women, but also to men; and as much as it purports to be promoting something enjoyable, it can’t (in my opinion) be seen in anyway to be sex-positive.

Now, I enjoy a good steak. I also love getting my cock sucked; but surely the whole point of sex is that whatever activities you indulge in, they should be enjoyable to both/all parties involved.  If the woman I’m with happens to be a fellatiophobic vegan, then that’s just how it is and I should respect that. There are plenty of other things we can do (and eat).

So, eat steak, if you like steak, and suck cock, if you like sucking cock, and do both, either or neither whenever the hell you like and, if you don’t like either, never feel under any obligation just to satisfy the “requirements” of some completely made-up day.

ZeN

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25 thoughts on “Steak & Blow-Job Day And All That Bollocks

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  1. I don’t mind Steak and BJ day…I think it’s just fun. I mean women get every other holiday really..valentine’s day is really for us women…the wedding day is really all about us women…we always get better birthday gifts than we give for the most part…Men just want to eat meat and have their lady eat their meat…it’s not expensive and it makes our BF or husband happy. Sometimes silly things are just silly and fun and that’s all.

    But I respect everyone’s opinion as well.

    But I really love giving BJs…so maybe that’s why it doesn’t bother me as much as others.

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  2. Most of the time I am amused at which “day it is,” but this definitely makes me re-think my amusement at SABJD. I like steak, and I enjoy giving blow jobs, but we don’t need a “special day” for it.

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  3. I must not get out enough because I’ve never heard of that day. As far as I’m concerned, It was named for me to enjoy a couple of delicious things.

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  4. I agree with you completely. Its something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, how bj’s are as much for my pleasure as they are for my husband. One of my friend’s got married recently, and she told me how one of her other friend’s commented that now she didn’t have to give bj’s anymore. I have so many mixed feelings about that statement; it’s simultaneously funny, sad, disappointing, and a commentary on an old way of looking at male-female sex. In short, I feel sorry for her friend. But I think that woman would probably be the type to “give in” on steak-and-bj day. I’m happy that I’m in the kind of relationship that such a day went completely unnoticed, b/c its no different than any other type of day.

    Jess

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  5. Actually I rather agree, it’s like when people ask for ‘special day (birthday, anniversary, Xmas, add your own here) anal’ … if it’s fun, it’s fun, and if you enjoy it do it, but not because it’s to be endured. now if it’s an activity on a special day because it’s a ritual, a reconnection or whatever, and perhaps a challenge to organise or find the time for, then I presume it’s a tradition you kept up because you like it, so brilliant, keep going.

    Humbly, twigs.

    PS you here is generic everyone you, not specific kilted/zen you, except if Kilted Wookie/Zen Nudist you does have a ritual day specific kinky thing it would be fun to know what that is….

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  6. My problem with SABJD is that I think it’s bullshit that women are “supposed” to get flowers and sweets when men are “supposed” to get delicious red meat and oral sex… fuck the flowers. I *also* want red meat and oral sex!!! 😀 Like you said, there shouldn’t be just one day for this; I find the gendered nature of these holidays – both of them – so frustrating.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. There’s no need to have special days for specific things. Steak and Blowjob day is as useless and unnecessary as Valentine’s day! Every day should be Steak and Blowjob day if that is what you fancy and every day should be a day of loving!

    Rebel xox

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  8. I think it’s funny that steak and blowjob day even exists although I won’t participate because blowjobs occur in my household every other day. It’s cute they’ve created something sexual for people to look forward to.

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    1. I get the “fun” behind it, and I know it’s meant to be lighthearted, but I just think it’s unnecessary. I won’t judge anyone who does participate and enjoys it, but like so many things, surely it should be any day, not just one particular day.

      ZeN

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Is there a candy and cunnilingus day? That would be great, you know maybe a month before this one, maybe dedicated to love and perpetuated by the gift card industry… 😉 jokes aside I agree that making it obligatory by suggestion that SBJ day is a real thing puts a shade on the act. Yes some people need a nudge and some people find it fun to make a silly and/or romantic evening out of it, I personally don’t like to be told what to do, when or how. If people really thought about it, SBJ day is condescending and degrading (anti-feminist or patriarchal even) for both parties IMO, assuming one or both parties have a dick. I remain on the idea that do what you want and what makes you feel good, if your feelings get hurt because your partner didn’t participate in a Controversial satirical holiday, get over it. I’m a woman and Vday never meant much to me beyond it being the day before cheap chocolate day, which is way, way better IMO. I mean it’s cool that on Vday some places do the office exchange of those treats you can buy or someone brings in cupcakes…. haha, could you imagine if they made this a real holiday? What would they hand out at the office then? What kind of cupcakes would they bring?

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  10. HERE HERE -well said KW – I totally agree – I love sucking my man’s cock and do not care what bloody day it is. Could i eat a steak just before doing it – now there’s a question? I prefer to have a lighter meal if i am then going to then engage in such a pleasurable physical activity.

    Liked by 1 person

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